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Letโ€™s laugh! ๐Ÿ˜‚

Teacher wrote on the board, 36x + yx, 2/3yx + 3x (66y + 12x).b =0

 He turned to Musa and said, โ€œSolve the problem.โ€

 Musa picked the duster, cleaned the board and said, โ€Problem solved! ๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†๐Ÿ˜†… Some of our problems require such solutions.

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Amazing Lens for Life


A famous writer was in his study room. He picked up his pen and started writing:**Last year, I had a surgery and my gallbladder was removed. I had to stay stuck to the bed due to this surgery for a long time.
 **The same year I reached the age of 60 years and had to give up my favourite job. I had spent 30 years of my life in this publishing company.
**The same year I experienced the sorrow of the death of my father.
 **And in the same year my son failed in his medical exam because he had a car accident. He had to stay in bed at hospital with the cast on for several days. The destruction of car was another loss.
 At the end he wrote: Alas! It was such bad year!!
 When the writerโ€™s wife entered the room, she found her husband looking sad lost in his thoughts. From behind his back she read what was written on the paper. She left the room silently and came back with another paper and placed it on the side of her husbandโ€™s writing.
When the writer saw this paper, he found this written on it:
 **Last year I finally got rid of my gall bladder due to which I had spent years in pain.
 **I turned 60 with sound health and got retired from my job. Now I can utilize my time to write something better with more focus and peace.
 **The same year my father, at the age of 95, without depending on anyone or without any critical condition met his Creator.
 **The same year, God blessed my son with a new life. My car was destroyed but my son stayed alive without getting any disability.
 At the end she wrote: This year was an immense blessing of God and it passed well!!
 See!! The same incidents but different viewpoints. If we ponder with this viewpoint that what could have happened more, we would truly become thankful to the Almighty.
Moral : In our daily lives we must see that itโ€™s not happiness that makes us grateful but gratefulness that makes us happy.
 There is always, always, always something to be thankful for!! Stay Blessed !!

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This post will “Make your day”.

 These are quite profound. If you will take the time to read, I promise you’ll walk away with an enlightened perspective. The subjects covered affect us all, on a daily basis. They’re complied from Life and written by a man who had the gift of saying a lot with very few words. ………Enjoy….

I’ve learned …That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I’ve learned …. That when you’re in love, it shows. 

I’ve learned …. That just one person saying to me, ‘You’ve made my day!’ makes my day.

I’ve learned …. That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned …. That being kind is more important than being right. 

I’ve learned …. That you should never say no to a gift from a child. 

I’ve learned …. That I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.  

I’ve learned …. That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.  

I’ve learned …. That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I’ve learned …. That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I’ve learned …. That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I’ve learned …. That we should be glad God doesn’t give us everything we ask for.

I’ve learned …. That money doesn’t buy class.

I’ve learned …. That it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I’ve learned …. That under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I’ve learned …. That to ignore the facts does not change the facts. 

I’ve learned …. That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I’ve learned …. That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them. 

I’ve learned … That life is tough, but I’m tougher. 

I’ve learned …. That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

 I’ve learned …. That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

 I’ve learned …. That I wish I could have told my parent/spouse that I love her/him one more time before she passed away.

I’ve learned …. That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I’ve learned ….. That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I’ve learned ….. That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.

I’ve learned …. That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing 

To all of you…. It’s National Friendship Week. Show your friends how much you care. 

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One way to Thwart Husband-snatchersย 

Advise for ladies, be smart ‘”My husband saved his sidechick’s name in his phone with “Edu Alaba”. When I discovered, I changed the name to 55227. Whenever she called, he would start murmuring that this MTN people will not allow his phone to rest and I will rush to the bathroom and laugh my ass out. It continued until she stopped calling him. That was how I got my husband back.!Women!!!! 
Copied oh๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜„

*******

*10 COMMUNICATION TIPS FOR COUPLES*

A lot of times, couples get pissed off with each other because of the way they respond to spoken words ” Hmmmm Naija Couples…๐Ÿ™ˆ”. We can do better if we learn response in the *affirmative* and not in the *combative*. Read the following:
1. *Statement:* I’m really hungry.

– *Wrong response:* Even I myself have not eaten since morning.

– *Right response:* Oh sorry, let’s see if there’s something you can manage for now.

 2. *Statement:* Why don’t you try this option?

– *Wrong response:* Why is it that you always find fault with what I do?

– *Right response:* Well, I’ve tried this before and I think it will work. If not, I’ll try that.

3. *Statement:* I want more food.

– *Wrong response:* Ha-ha, rice has finished, garri has finished, and ingredients are almost finished, and there’s no sign of salary yet.

– *Right response:* Sorry, please manage that for now; I’ll find some snacks for you later.

4. *Statement:* I can’t finish this food.

– *Wrong response:* Ha-ha, things are expensive o; and you can’t be wasting food like this. You will eat it tomorrow!

– *Right response:* Should I keep the rest for you, or give it out?

5. *Statement:* I got wounded in kitchen.

– *Wrong response:* I’ve told you to always be careful with the knife.

– *Right response:* Oh sorry, let me have a look. You need to be more careful next time.

6. *Statement:* Are you okay; is anything the matter with you?
– *Wrong response:* Can’t you see yourself; what kind of question is that?

– *Right response:* I’m not feeling fine; I think I need some attention.

7. *Statement:* I’ll like to eat corn flakes.

– *Wrong response:* No way! It’s for the children; and that’s for one month! Take garri if you are hungry.

– *Right response:* Okay, you can eat a little. I trust you’ll give us money to stock another.

8. *Statement:* Haven’t you finished what you are doing?
– *Wrong response:* You are seated there doing nothing and you are asking if I’ve not finished!

– *Right response:* It will still take a while; can you please lend me a hand?

9. *Statement:* I bought this on my way; I thought it will be useful.

– *Wrong response:* How much did you buy it? What! That’s too expensive – wแปฬn ti gbรก แบน!

– *Right response:* Thank you; it will indeed be useful. Thanks for the surprise.

10. *Statement:* Handle that thing carefully please.
– *Wrong response:* Am I that daft? You will just be instructing me as if I don’t have any sense.

– *Right response:* Yes dear, I will.

Soft Answer turneth away wrath (prov 15vs 1)…God help us All….
Practical Teaching Methods: 

A son was busy arguing with his father insisting that 1 + 1 was equal to 11.

The father looked at the son and said: “Go and buy 2 boiled eggs, the son went and returned with the two eggs.

The father said, Give one to me and another to your brother. And the son asks: “What about mine?” The father responds: eat the nine eggs that are left … nonsense!

๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

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Laugh It Off

Some Humour A Day Keeps the Boredom Away: I asked my new girlfriend what sort of books she’s interested in.

She said – Cheque books.
๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ˜…

The easiest way to make your old car run better, is to check the prices of new car.

๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜„

Q: What’s the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?

A: A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜

Definition of Nurse :  

A beautiful woman who holds your hand for one full minute and then expects your pulse to be normal.

๐Ÿ˜ง๐Ÿ˜
 Boss:- We are very keen on cleanliness. Did you wipe your feet on the mat as you came in?

New employee: Yes, sir.

Boss: We are also keen on truthfulness. There is no mat.
๐Ÿ˜ง๐Ÿ˜„

Q: Why dogs don’t marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog’s life!

๐Ÿ˜›๐Ÿ˜„

Q: What’s the similarity between mother & wife?

A: One woman brings you into the world crying 

& the other ensures you continue to do so.

๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ

What’s the difference between a good secretary and a personal secretary?
One says “Good morning, boss”. 
The other says “It’s morning, boss.” 

๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ๐Ÿ˜ƒ Keep smiling!!

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