Reblogging this great piece from Tika Sumpter of BMWK!
Two of my greatest blessings have been having an amazing single mother raise me and being mommy to my two awesome daughters. I’m so grateful God used me as the vessel to deliver my girls into the world and made me responsible for their upbringing. Although I’ve had parenting challenges along the way, I wouldn’t trade this role for any other in the world.
My mommy title forces me to be a woman and wife of noble character as consistently as possible. It’s critical that I am mindful of my behaviors as well as the words I choose to use. My daughters examine my every move and pattern their behavior after mine. I am teaching them things even when I’m not intentional. The goal for every parent should be to spend more time being intentional. There are life lessons girls are required to learn from both parents, but quite a few should specifically come from her mother. A mother and daughter bond is such a special relationship, there are some very specific things every girl should learn from her mother.
How to to pray, believe and develop a spiritual connection to our heavenly father. I can only imagine how much I would have struggled had I not been introduced to God by my Grandmother and Mother. Being rooted with a solid spiritual foundation guides us through all of life’s ups and downs.
How to love herself. We must remind our girls how to value their bodies by eating right and cleaning properly, as well as how to choose potential mates wisely. They should be reminded often that no matter what the world says, it is a must they love their hair, skin, shade, shape and every inch of their being. Knowing who we are and what we bring, truly prepares us for this world.
How to treat others. We all know life’s golden rule. It’s imperative our daughters live it as well. This lesson won’t always have to be spoken because our children learn how to treat others by watching how we treat people. We must teach them to be kind, honest and always keep their word.
How to show up in a marriage or committed partnership. Another observation our daughters will make is how to build and maintain a love relationship. If they are raised in a home where love and relationships aren’t honored and respected, they will repeat the cycle. Sacrifice, respect and healthy communication are essential to any relationship and need to be taught to our daughters.
How to manage money, save and invest in herself. The greatest lesson any of us could learn is how to plan for our future. Early lessons on the value of managing money will prepare our children for a healthy financial future.
How to be bold and let her voice be heard. I love telling my girls just how amazing they are. I encourage them to pursue their dreams with a fire and passion and never allow anyone to tell them what they can’t do. I urge them to ask questions and share their ideas and not just sit in a room quietly. We miss opportunities when we don’t open our mouths.
How to give every goal her everything. We must teach our little ladies not to half-do anything. Highlighting the results of poor performance is an excellent reality check to utilize with our young girls. It must become clear to them that hard work is a necessity for any worthwhile success.
How to overcome adversity. As women we had to learn how to overcome. As a result, we were able to strengthen our character with every challenge. Our girls must learn how to stand strong during times of trial. We must remind them there is a lesson to be learned in every moment and that they too are survivors.
How to be of service. This life is not our own, we were created to be love as well as give love. Teaching our daughters the value of volunteering and assisting those in need will greatly shape the women they will become.
How to care for a family (if that daughter decides to create one): Again, this is another one our children will learn simply by watching. We have to show them not only how to love and support their family, but also how to ask for help and take that much needed time for themselves.
A variety of life lessons will surface as a result of our mothering styles. In order for our girls to blossom into the women we pray they will become, we have to mindful and intentional with what we demonstrate for them daily.